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The history of box ticking

BMJ 2006; 333 doi: https://doi.org/10.1136/bmj.333.7567.557-a (Published 07 September 2006) Cite this as: BMJ 2006;333:557

Rapid Response:

The History of Box Ticking

Delegates at the 4th ICMB-T heard of a remarkable piece of detective
work. A land mark paper was presented by the President of the College of
Hearing Aid Extractors (the elite right side division) on behalf of a team
combining the talented of MM University Medical School of Chipping-at-Nothing and Board Certificated of the RD Academy of Medicine. By
voluntarily giving up many of their free afternoons, this group had found,
and in large measure had reconstructed, a very early read-questionnaire-tick-box (a type thought to have required a primitive writing implement to
complete) from material partially destroyed, possibly by a shredding
device, and found in a green-fill.

They were excited especially as it was likely to be late PreB era.
It was being considered that the strange writing on an extinct conifer
based medium referenced a shameful period when operating theatres had been
filled with the malnourished. These hideous Rubenesque creatures rarely
weighed 100kg. It was thought - and this amused the delegates - that the
questionnaire had yet to be routinely subject to the methodology of
illogical regression to banality of ticks otherwise these tragic cases
would not have had to suffer for so long. Pioneering and strenuous efforts
certainly were made, ultimately with total success over several decades,
to ensure operating theatres graced by more natural and normal Freudesque.

Delegates had a gismological zapogram (illustrated) beamed into some
space in their brains:-

'Complete statistical correlation between kg and q's! Jeez, out there
are a lot of fat people making b. q's for me to fill in!

Delegates were told that by analysing the residue of primitive ink,
called biro that had been used for manually pressurising confirmatory
affirmability, the tick and the hieroglyph were of contemporary sameness.
With the co-operation of The CMO Alzheimer Foundation Museum of
Forgetfulness (acknowledged in writing) which fortunately had remembered
to keep an early manual keyboard coder, and with 2 units
gGgbyte/cerebrocyte/time :-
Are you retiring at 60? translated as r u goin urly i *^%!!¡±

With further study, the researchers hoped that by the 5th ICMB-T, to
fully decipher the hieroglyph and present unique insight into why 20th C
doctors could have been so stupid to think that the fabled insoluble TB
equation was simply rubbish and not an important thing.

Competing interests:
None declared

Competing interests: No competing interests

16 September 2006
Ian D Conacher
Consultant anaesthetist
Freeman Hospital, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE7 7DN