Medical personnel should be aware that, in the lead up to the Festive Season, some patients may present with an Acute Confusional State (ACS). This may be interpreted as ‘Long Covid’ (‘The Great Imitator’), but is likely to represent an inability to fully comprehend the Rules relating to Support Bubbles, Carer Bubbles and Christmas Bubbles.
For ease of reference a summary is provided here:
A person living alone with one cat may form a bubble with another household which has one or two cats, provided that the cats have been neutered and have not been in contact with any other cats during the previous fourteen days. However, if a household with a cat forms a bubble with a household containing a budgerigar, the bird must be kept socially-isolated in its cage at all times due to the risk of, (a) asymptomatically transmitting avian flu to the turkey, and/or, (b) being eaten.
A family of one or two individuals with a dog may form a bubble with another household of up to three individuals and two dogs, provided that the dogs are muzzled and have not tested positive for coronavirus. The dogs’ nails should be clipped so as to avoid the risk of a claw accidentally bursting the bubble.
Although The Virus may be taking a break from 23rd to 27th December, bubbles formed between 2nd and 23rd December may still contain Virus. In the event of such a bubble bursting, Virus is highly likely to travel airborne over a considerable distance and become deposited on nearby surfaces. In the unfortunate circumstance of the Christmas tree becoming Contaminated, the Head of the Household should don full PPE and remove the tree to an outdoor position, such as a garden or the front lawn of a local MP. Taking due care, the branches should be sprayed with Hand Sanitiser containing a minimum of 70% alcohol (brandy or vodka would be a suitable alternative) and incinerated. Eye protection in the form of safety goggles and/or a full Face Visor is recommended. Ashes can be buried immediately or mixed with quick-lime and disposed of in the normal household waste.
Gifts located under the tree may similarly become fomites and must be quarantined for seven days before opening. Any wrapping paper should be binned and not recycled into face-coverings.
Christmas dinner must be served with all parties fully Alert and wearing Oven Gloves. Vegetables must be spaced one sprout-width apart on the plate and food should not be shared, with the exception of Christmas pudding, provided that it has been flambeed.
Since the NHS will be Fully Protected over the Festive Period, any individual falling ill on Christmas Day will be required to telephone 666 and ask for Santa Claus, who has had two-days’ training by SearchCo, to provide medical triage. A cohort of volunteer elves have been awarded a contract worth £100 billion to transport patients, by sleigh, to the nearest hub. The public are therefore requested to leave extra carrots for the reindeer as they will be working excessively long hours.
The Rules are likely to be changed on 28th December into New Year bubbles, so staff should remain fully Alert to the amendments as they occur.
Rapid Response:
Re: Xmas: Understanding Bubbles
Dear Editor
Medical personnel should be aware that, in the lead up to the Festive Season, some patients may present with an Acute Confusional State (ACS). This may be interpreted as ‘Long Covid’ (‘The Great Imitator’), but is likely to represent an inability to fully comprehend the Rules relating to Support Bubbles, Carer Bubbles and Christmas Bubbles.
For ease of reference a summary is provided here:
A person living alone with one cat may form a bubble with another household which has one or two cats, provided that the cats have been neutered and have not been in contact with any other cats during the previous fourteen days. However, if a household with a cat forms a bubble with a household containing a budgerigar, the bird must be kept socially-isolated in its cage at all times due to the risk of, (a) asymptomatically transmitting avian flu to the turkey, and/or, (b) being eaten.
A family of one or two individuals with a dog may form a bubble with another household of up to three individuals and two dogs, provided that the dogs are muzzled and have not tested positive for coronavirus. The dogs’ nails should be clipped so as to avoid the risk of a claw accidentally bursting the bubble.
Although The Virus may be taking a break from 23rd to 27th December, bubbles formed between 2nd and 23rd December may still contain Virus. In the event of such a bubble bursting, Virus is highly likely to travel airborne over a considerable distance and become deposited on nearby surfaces. In the unfortunate circumstance of the Christmas tree becoming Contaminated, the Head of the Household should don full PPE and remove the tree to an outdoor position, such as a garden or the front lawn of a local MP. Taking due care, the branches should be sprayed with Hand Sanitiser containing a minimum of 70% alcohol (brandy or vodka would be a suitable alternative) and incinerated. Eye protection in the form of safety goggles and/or a full Face Visor is recommended. Ashes can be buried immediately or mixed with quick-lime and disposed of in the normal household waste.
Gifts located under the tree may similarly become fomites and must be quarantined for seven days before opening. Any wrapping paper should be binned and not recycled into face-coverings.
Christmas dinner must be served with all parties fully Alert and wearing Oven Gloves. Vegetables must be spaced one sprout-width apart on the plate and food should not be shared, with the exception of Christmas pudding, provided that it has been flambeed.
Since the NHS will be Fully Protected over the Festive Period, any individual falling ill on Christmas Day will be required to telephone 666 and ask for Santa Claus, who has had two-days’ training by SearchCo, to provide medical triage. A cohort of volunteer elves have been awarded a contract worth £100 billion to transport patients, by sleigh, to the nearest hub. The public are therefore requested to leave extra carrots for the reindeer as they will be working excessively long hours.
The Rules are likely to be changed on 28th December into New Year bubbles, so staff should remain fully Alert to the amendments as they occur.
Competing interests: No competing interests