Intended for healthcare professionals

Soundings Soundings


BMJ 1999; 318 doi: (Published 09 January 1999) Cite this as: BMJ 1999;318:135
  1. George Dunea, attending physician.
  1. Cook County Hospital, Chicago, USA

    Do not take your children to see Vampires, especially if you object to foul language, to guts being ripped out, and heads chopped off in one fell swoop. But you should know that with modern vampires garlic will not work, bullets are ineffective, and even a cross will not drive them away.

    Always look up when entering a room because vampires may hide on the ceiling. Never confront a master vampire between dawn and dusk. …

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