Responses to infertility

In response to being unable to conceive, many people feel emotions such as anger, panic, despair, and grief, and these may have several effects on sexual activity. The stress of infertility and its treatment may be a cause of sexual difficulties for both the prospective father and mother.

Intercourse may be avoided, with patterns of behaviour established, so that one or other partner is not reminded of the fertility problem. Postcoital tests or having to provide semen samples may result in a man feeling under pressure to perform, adversely affecting his erectile or ejaculatory ability. For some men, one or two failures during intercourse begins a vicious circle of fear of failure, with anxiety leading to further failures. Partners may also develop arousal difficulties because of anxiety or distress. Some individuals feel that their partner seems to want them only when there is a chance of conception, and sexual activity can then become a battleground for issues of power and control.